Just Say “Thank You”

I was shooting at a catered event recently with young people as servers. In attendance were people with money.

One server, a kid no older than 21, was stationed behind the buffet. A few paces away, a man stood around with his kids, one who seemed to be about eight. The eight year old said “Dad, I want pasta with red sauce”. There was none on the buffet, and the server behind the counter stepped forward, having overheard this.

It was clear he was going to offer to get the brat some pasta with red sauce. The man turned to the server without actually looking at him and stated “Pasta with red sauce.”

He didn’t say “please”, he didn’t say “thank you”.

Something in this man’s demeanor before this interaction left me not surprised that he was rude, but I was sad to be found correct.

The server returned and the father took the plate from him, again without looking at the server or giving him a “thank you”.

The eight-year-old then took a few bites and left the pasta on a windowsill somewhere. As eight year olds do.

When the dad was out of earshot, I approached the server and whispered “Since he can’t be bothered to thank you, I will. Thank you for doing that for him”

The server was clearly unsure of how to respond. He likely only expected statements like “Where are the napkins?” all evening, and it seemed like he wasn’t sure what was “safe” to say in response to me.

The young server was a black, the man white. It’s entirely possible that the man would have been just as rude to the server no matter his skin color (and I would have thanked the kid anyway), but it somehow just pissed me off more.

Thank you, man, for being inconsiderate in front of your child and teaching your brat that courtesy is nothing. You’re a real winner.